tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3599187891382462762024-03-13T15:16:00.266-04:00Amazing Sydney Grace"God is able to do immeasurably more than all we could ask or imagine." Ephesians 3:20Hilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12098948415614752971noreply@blogger.comBlogger94125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-65395231927337477222011-01-09T14:11:00.008-05:002011-01-09T22:00:14.396-05:00Happy Birthday Sydney GraceI know this is two days late, but I would love to let everyone know how special Sydney Grace's 1st birthday was. In the weeks leading up to January 7th, I was not sure how I was going to react on her birthday. I really thought I would be very depressed and sad on her day. Actually, I was feeling that way for the past two weeks. Surprisingly, I thought January 7th was a pretty good day. We all focused on how wonderful the day of her birth actually was. It was a day that was supposed be a terrible day. Instead it was a day of miracles. It was the best day of me life for sure!<br /><br />Joel and I decided we would have all our family over for a dinner to celebrate Sydney Grace's birthday. It was really nice having everyone over. We even had some special guests. The two nurses that delivered Sydney Grace, Bobbi and Marg, along with their daughters came for a visit. They gave me an awesome gift that Marg's daughter drew by hand. It is a picture of an angel holding an angel baby. It is beautiful. It has an inscription that says.."I have a feeling there's one more star up in the sky tonight... And even though it's far away, its brightness and warmth still reach us and make the night a little less dark." Here is a photo of the picture and of my two fabulous nurses and the artist. <A href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2ybUibkYzQj2RZwjow4tLdmDfYbsuCBmyTuwASkeWyxFBRMiO9FCyebMAfman8whD5NMhi5lsaFdo3xiJumKPYZbVnGf_EQ0GIxVR4d-V10HAthE8nXHTdE6QK80q61cEGbklYUgS3OX4/s1600/1stbirthday1+%25281%2529.JPG"><IMG style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 156px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 200px; CURSOR: hand" id=BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5560379523513885442 border=0 alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2ybUibkYzQj2RZwjow4tLdmDfYbsuCBmyTuwASkeWyxFBRMiO9FCyebMAfman8whD5NMhi5lsaFdo3xiJumKPYZbVnGf_EQ0GIxVR4d-V10HAthE8nXHTdE6QK80q61cEGbklYUgS3OX4/s200/1stbirthday1+%25281%2529.JPG"></A> <A href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEFDO8O1u_uhLh6VAWyDxT1TzdU_0NnSu5f5eKU0mTOjHF2Z4IDs2iR3Q1VvPii6CkdAzK9xMt3K5_ch41d2vYY1L28elvBJ_cR1b33ZEQxIF6eYIEiAmnAOFcHVskED9s9q6aHE4ppj20/s1600/1stbirthday1+%25282%2529.JPG"><IMG style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 150px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 200px; CURSOR: hand" id=BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5560379804719910594 border=0 alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEFDO8O1u_uhLh6VAWyDxT1TzdU_0NnSu5f5eKU0mTOjHF2Z4IDs2iR3Q1VvPii6CkdAzK9xMt3K5_ch41d2vYY1L28elvBJ_cR1b33ZEQxIF6eYIEiAmnAOFcHVskED9s9q6aHE4ppj20/s200/1stbirthday1+%25282%2529.JPG"></A><br /><br />At the end of our family dinner, Rafe blew out one candle on Sydney's cake in honor and memory of her. I thought it would nice for Rafe to be able to take part in the celebration of Sydney Grace's life. We also had a balloon release in honor of Sydney's first birthday. My original plan was to attach a card that had a note from everyone written to Sydney. Unfortunately, it was too heavy for the balloon to lift off the ground. On a positive note, I will now have this as one more thing to show how much we all love and miss Sydney Grace. I am know reliving those twenty days we had with her. I can almost remember something that happened on everyone of those days. I have to say I am not looking forward to the 27th, but hopefully it will bring some comfort in knowing Sydney Grace is better off than those of us left behind. She is in the arms of our creator, no other place better. <br /><br />Here are two videos from our dinner on Sydney Grace's birthday.<br /><iframe width="480" height="295" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/7lHteT9zUv8?fs=1" frameborder="0"></iframe><br /><iframe width="480" height="295" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/M40EjchkEi0?fs=1" frameborder="0"></iframe>Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-8947088491297156582010-11-18T21:04:00.006-05:002010-11-18T21:21:39.077-05:00New BabyIt has been 4 months since the last time I have written on the blog... A lot has happened. At the end of August I found I was pregnant again!! It was unexpected, but very welcomed. Needless to say I was extremely nervous at the very beginning, just praying that this baby would be healthy. A few weeks ago, we visited the same specialist we did every month while pregnant with Sydney Grace to make sure they baby was healthy. Everything looked great! Here are some ultrasound photos from that visit.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYNSQaxIunGwcd37n6GG3xgITHDbEiQIhehEeKJuXGk36-q553wit6Hqd50jAp43Rvj-XCmNIBxcFUS5P277jTILdl5xFTiV5m_WBW_CC6aFc499e9ugnnZhpa9TkQNkd2Rzy4CR6dyK21/s1600/bf3_3.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 242px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYNSQaxIunGwcd37n6GG3xgITHDbEiQIhehEeKJuXGk36-q553wit6Hqd50jAp43Rvj-XCmNIBxcFUS5P277jTILdl5xFTiV5m_WBW_CC6aFc499e9ugnnZhpa9TkQNkd2Rzy4CR6dyK21/s320/bf3_3.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5541077434480743858" /></a><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgh1_W-LFnVZXzejfnCl7n1j4Bzu4H_RS7S4kJhQjekPVhbsVhRjq_Ny9DKpNa3KeScSwxb2NLkBQg24oDhjTgs08nTM4T7UuZmEfU1ZP6Xt-GB5jrqKoTISKDGXV5S-4rb75Dozw-1pNi6/s1600/bf3_2.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 233px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgh1_W-LFnVZXzejfnCl7n1j4Bzu4H_RS7S4kJhQjekPVhbsVhRjq_Ny9DKpNa3KeScSwxb2NLkBQg24oDhjTgs08nTM4T7UuZmEfU1ZP6Xt-GB5jrqKoTISKDGXV5S-4rb75Dozw-1pNi6/s320/bf3_2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5541077305321333794" /></a><br />My goal to is continue this blog, sharing about the new baby and Rafe's many adventures!Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-88515486910293616822010-07-27T22:41:00.004-04:002010-07-27T23:14:27.154-04:00Sydney Grace's GiftI want to share a story that was first posted, I believe on facebook, a few days after Sydney Grace was born. I am not sure who shared this, but thank you. It is so fitting to Sydney Grace's life, that I had it read at her funeral. <br /><em><br />Once upon a special day in Heaven up above, The tiniest souls sat at God's feet, surrounded by his love. The time was coming, very soon, God said, do not be scared. Your family awaits your arrival, now let us get prepared. And so God looked upon these souls, in mute consideration. He knew the life each one would live, He weighed each situation.<br /><br />The souls chatted amongst themselves, and wondered who they'd be. They knew the day grew closer; soon, they'd meet their family. How would you like to change the world? God asked each soul in fun. The chance to change a soul, a heart, is held by only one. I'm going to make the world laugh, one soul said with a smile, for laughter heals a broken heart, and helps us through each trial. Then take with you the brightest smile, and share your laughter well. The soul thanked God immensely, and down to earth he fell.<br /><br />And I'll remind the world to sing, a sweet little soul told the Lord. I have the gift of a beautiful voice; I can hit every note and every chord. You’ll have the gift of music then, a voice, lovely and strong. Share your gift with others, and let them hear your song.<br /><br />I will show compassion, the next little soul raised her hand. Some people only need a friend, someone to understand. Compassion is a good thing, God said with much delight. To you, I will give mercy. You'll perceive wrong from right. And so each soul shared every thought, their plans, their hopes, their dreams. And God explained that life, it is, much harder than it seems. And as each soul began to leave in a scurry of laughter and fun.<br /><br />Heaven became quiet and still, for left was only one. Come sit with me my little child, God said with just a sigh. Do you know how many you will touch, in a world left wondering why? Before your life comes to an end, you will know much strife, but you'll teach those who know you, to cherish the smallest things in life. And some may only know you through a simple photograph, they'll never hold you in their arms, or memorize your laugh. Some may only know you through the words they read each day, but you'll do something wonderful, you'll make them stop and pray. The tiniest soul raised her head up, to touch God's firm, strong hand. Father, I am ready for, the life that you have planned. And I will do the best I can without a word or deed. For you Lord, are the planter, and I will be your seed. She could already hear many praying, and although they had not seen her face, they were praying for her safe arrival, they were asking for mercy and grace. What talent do I leave with Lord? What gift do you impart? All that you will need, God said, I've placed within your heart. And so God kissed this tiny child, knowing all that she would be, and whispered as he watched her go...You'll teach them . . . to love me.<br /><br />- Author Unknown</em><br /><br />The first time I read this, I cried. I could not believe how perfect this described my child. So many people did pray for her safe arrival.... so many only know of her through photos or the words they read .... so many did grow closer to God because of her....<br /><br />She continues to touch so many, even complete strangers. Just today a lady, that I have never met, emailed me to say how much Sydney Grace has touched her life. I had someone come up to me a few weeks ago in Mrytle Beach because she recognized me from this blog. I am amazed of the lasting impression Sydney Grace has left on so many. <br /><br />One more example of how she will continue to touch lives: I am happy to say that because of all the generous donations, over $12,000, to the Sydney Grace memorial fund, Carteret General will be sending nurses and social workers to training for pediatric hospice. Carteret County does not have a pediatric hospice. I was very fortunate that Sydney Grace really did not need these services. We had great family support, and we had some wonderful friends that were nurses. Everyone that faces what we did might not have the support system that we had. They might need hospice services and now they will!! <br /><br />It has been six months and Sydney Grace is still amazing me. She truly was and still is "Amazing Sydney Grace."Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-72125787273013938782010-07-07T22:33:00.004-04:002010-07-07T23:21:36.264-04:00Lessons learnedWhat have I learned in the past six months?<br />1. Obviously, this is the hardest thing I have ever gone through. Yes, to most people, I am doing just fine. One of my favorite lines from "I Will Carry You" is "People say that I am brave but I’m not, Truth is I’m barely hanging on." I think I am doing a pretty good job with everyday life. I can function. I am able to carry on with normal things: work, cleaning, cooking, taking care of Rafe. Most days are pretty good. But the truth is there are lots of time that I am barely hanging on. I often wondered before Sydney Grace was born how I would deal with her death. There is a constant under current of sadness. Sometimes it overwhelms me. <br /><br />This brings me to my second point:<br />2. It is ok to grieve. I few weeks ago I heard a sermon that was perfect for me. It was titled "Eternity and Grief: Side by Side." I KNOW Sydney Grace is in a better place. I know she will never feel pain, yet I still grieve. Lots of people would say if you are a good Christian, then you should not grieve. It is almost selfish. We are feeling sorry for ourselves. Guess what: it is ok. It does not take away the fact that Sydney Grace is in a perfect place. I still grieve for what might have been. Today Sydney Grace would have been six months old. She would be sitting up, probably eating baby food. I never got to see her laugh or crawl. These are things that upset me the most. I so wanted a baby girl. I got her and I am so thankful that I had her for those 20 wonderful days, but I still grieve for the times I will never share with her. <br /><br />Now for some wonderful news. Because of all the generous people who donated money to the CGH nursery fund, over $12,000 was raised. I have talked with the hospital and they are looking to use this money as a fund to do three things. Because there is no pediatric hospice in Carteret County they plan on sending some current hospice workers to training for pediatrics. Also they plan on bringing in counselors for those families. They even may be able to have funds for families that can not afford funeral expenses. Obviously, $12,000 could not cover all of this for an extended period of time, but it is a start. The plan is to continue to raise money for this fund. Who knew Sydney Grace would continue to touch the lives of so many people? I have said it before, but I will say it again, I am so proud to be her mother. She was only here on this earth for 20 days, but she has blessed so many!Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-8455067966358737982010-06-07T21:21:00.002-04:002010-06-07T21:28:48.890-04:00What time is she going to heaven?Today Sydney Grace would have been five months old. As I have been remembering that day today all I can think about was how happy I was. I went into the day thinking it would be the worst day of my life, but it turned into the BEST day of my life. <br /><br />I was looking at photos and videos tonight from that wonderful day. I came across this video that I want to share. If you listen closely, you will hear Rafe in the background asking,"What time is she going to heaven?" He then I asked about Jesus' hand and if we will see his hand as she goes to heaven. This is such a precious memory for me. This video is something I will treasure forever.<br /><br /><object width="500" height="405"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/jSNKJLuoVsI&hl=en_US&fs=1&color1=0xcc2550&color2=0xe87a9f&border=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/jSNKJLuoVsI&hl=en_US&fs=1&color1=0xcc2550&color2=0xe87a9f&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="500" height="405"></embed></object>Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-14713026216202296732010-05-26T20:23:00.007-04:002010-05-26T21:13:41.270-04:00Sydney Grace's bathAt this very moment four months ago, Sydney Grace was taking her first and last bath in a tub. I keep thinking about that tonight. That was the night that she passed away. The whole week before, she was struggling. At first she had terrible diarrhea which caused her to be severely dehydrated. Then it turned into constipation. That was why she had the warm bath. Her tummy was so bloated and she was so uncomfortable. Just as soon as she was placed in the tub she just relaxed. We could tell she really like it, which was so unlike the first time Rafe took a bath in a tub. He screamed bloody murder.<br /><br />I have never shared this photo before, but this is Sydney Grace taking her bath. She was so sick and it breaks my heart seeing her this way. For some reason I did not want people to see this photo. I guess because she looks so weak. At first I did not even think about taking a picture because we were all so concerned about her health that night, but then she did something that made me have to get my iphone. She was so relaxed that she crossed her little legs and propped them on the edge of the tub. She was in heaven. Of course, I did not get the photo fast enough with her feet on the edge, but I think you can see in the picture that she was really relaxed. <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtmc83YaMqQ23HX8T-iyeojLtBgcdkcPtSpBlMzUsDMOxO1gscTO1YL7bQxmgldHd0jDhbBlLUqV024vIZ02OzKwmTcPN9EZOEIiE3Bk2PkDSXbltbh4b999-muPXu1hyphenhyphenSK7UfSAgypRji/s1600/bath.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtmc83YaMqQ23HX8T-iyeojLtBgcdkcPtSpBlMzUsDMOxO1gscTO1YL7bQxmgldHd0jDhbBlLUqV024vIZ02OzKwmTcPN9EZOEIiE3Bk2PkDSXbltbh4b999-muPXu1hyphenhyphenSK7UfSAgypRji/s320/bath.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5475747270738132386" /></a> This was the second to last photo ever taken of Sydney Grace. I have one more photo, her last, that I have never shared. It is of her wrapped in her towel crying after her bath. I am not ready to share that photo...not yet anyway.<br /><br />I remember as everyone was leaving that night, my sister offered to stay with me. I told her no, that I was planning on sleeping with Sydney. She called me later on that night still concerned about Sydney Grace's constipation. I remember saying I had a bad feeling that this was a sign of the end. That her body was probably shutting down. I said the constipation was not worrying me so much, as her breathing was. She was struggling even with the oxygen tank. I did not know for sure if she would pass that night, but I had a feeling it was coming soon.<br /><br />It's been four months now. It feels like such a long time ago, yet I can still feel her in my arms. I can still remember how I woke up that night and felt her limp body and her heavy breathing. How she just looked at me the whole time as she was taking her last breaths...Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-86724297842357373972010-05-09T21:13:00.017-04:002010-05-09T23:32:39.720-04:00Happy Mother's DayIt's been a long time... I have been so busy with work, Rafe, life...that I have not been able to sit down long enough to write. Since the last entry Joel and I celebrated our 10 year anniversary. We started dating when we were 16 years old, so we have been together for almost 17 years. I feel old... We have had a really full life together. We have lived in three different states (California, Alabama, and North Carolina), Joel completed graduate school and got his Ph.D, we have had two wonderful children, and had to bury one of them. I just keep thinking about if someone told us back in 1993 when we started dating if in 17 years we would have to bury a child what would we say? We have had a lifetime of experiences just in our short 10 years of marriage. I can honestly say that although this past year has been difficult, Joel has amazed me. He has shown me a side of him that I have never seen before. I love him more and more each year.<br /><br />Sydney Grace would have been four months old on Friday. It seems like an eternity ago. I went to visit her grave today (on Mother's Day.) I just sat there by myself and talked to her. I so wanted to hold her. For some reason, I love to listen to music while I am visiting her grave. I usually listen to two songs, "I will Carry you," and "Fly." I can not remember if I have shared this before, but as Sydney was taking her last breaths I played those two songs as I rocked her. I had not woken up Joel yet so it was just me and my baby. I will never forget how she just looked at me the whole time. It was so peaceful... That is a memory I will treasure for the rest of my life.<br /><br />I have been reading the book "I Will Carry You" by Angie Smith. She is the woman that the song was written about. Her baby, Audrey Caroline, passed away after two hours. This book is really, really good. Angie tells the story of Audrey by bringing in the story of Jesus and Lazarus. I am only half way through the book but it amazes me that all our stories are so similar. We, mothers, all go through the same decisions, emotions, hurt when we are faced with having a child that will die. I am looking forward to finishing this wonderful book. I really recommend this to anyone that is going through something this terrible or to those of you that want to understand. <br /><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Will-Carry-You-Sacred-Dance/dp/080546428X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1273461497&sr=8-1"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8N_9XpmSPzT9j9ElmrBM4mU4St2JfBuZgvn-9L9pCc_-sKdE0v0l5r93Fd0ycgDWVxu8V_HiMVQmQDU8g90vMlJx4aezVmqjhKiFr-rUeQsQHzj-fnk2X4jI0h1GFNHjnnTMc7Hf61jNt/s1600/51uLgBbgNCL__SX35_.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 35px; height: 54px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8N_9XpmSPzT9j9ElmrBM4mU4St2JfBuZgvn-9L9pCc_-sKdE0v0l5r93Fd0ycgDWVxu8V_HiMVQmQDU8g90vMlJx4aezVmqjhKiFr-rUeQsQHzj-fnk2X4jI0h1GFNHjnnTMc7Hf61jNt/s400/51uLgBbgNCL__SX35_.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5469475269917044514" /></a></a><br />I had breakfast with Rafe at his school on Friday. The preschool gave a "Muffins for Mothers" breakfast in honor of Mother's Day. Rafe was so excited. For the past few weeks he has been telling me about all I was going to get. He was so funny. He would say, "I am going to sing you a song, but I can't tell you," or "I made you a picture frame, but I can't tell you." I will have to say Rafe's teachers really did do a lot of crafts with them. I got a shell picture frame, a poem, a paper rose, a bracelet, a plant and a song. Of course, I forgot my camera with the video recorder so I could not get Rafe singing his song. Here is a picture of Rafe and his future wife, Shelby. Rafe informed Shelby at the breakfast that her name was going to be Shelby Fodrie. <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigsh9jiTffhqEuecEbnYARKJSRR1QHRi5btmFerEG0uR_9JO2AeiX4KWFeohHzy8JMGke7n5bI_YEQgPcwz57TBnbF6RRVVC0EGHYSB_pr6-UKXGTsuMHHC3fWzaCuGGfamndhA7N-ZXd2/s1600/photo.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigsh9jiTffhqEuecEbnYARKJSRR1QHRi5btmFerEG0uR_9JO2AeiX4KWFeohHzy8JMGke7n5bI_YEQgPcwz57TBnbF6RRVVC0EGHYSB_pr6-UKXGTsuMHHC3fWzaCuGGfamndhA7N-ZXd2/s320/photo.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5469456308471379490" /></a><br /><br />Please continue to pray for me. I am going through a difficult time right now with my health. My thyroid is completely out of control. If any of you know about hypothyroidism, you know that it affects a lot. The last month I have really felt the effects of this. Hopefully, my wonderful doctor will get it under control soon.<br /><br />I would like to share an email I got today about mothers.<br /><br /><em><br />A Newborn ' s Conversation with God <br /><br />A baby asked God, "They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?" <br /><br />God said, "Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you." <br /><br />The child further inquired, "But tell me, here in heaven I don't have <br />to do anything but sing and smile to be happy." <br /><br />God said, "Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you. <br />And you will feel your angel's love and be very happy." <br /><br />Again the small child asked, "And how am I going to be able to understand when people talk to me if I don't know the language?" <br /><br />God said, "Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words <br />you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will <br />teach you how to speak." <br /><br />"And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?" <br /><br />God said, "Your angel will place your hands together and will teach <br />you how to pray." <br /><br />"Who will protect me?" <br /><br />God said, "Your angel will defend you even if it means risking its life." <br /><br />"But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore." <br /><br />God said, "Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach <br />you the way to come back to Me, even though I will always be next to you." <br /><br />At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth <br />could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, "God, if I am to leave <br />now, please tell me my angel's name." <br /><br />God said, You will simply call her, "Mom."</em><br /><br />Happy Mother's Day to all the Mothers of Angels in HeavenLindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-29489137656351947302010-04-18T22:01:00.004-04:002010-04-19T16:24:45.037-04:00Great WeekendI had such a busy and wonderful weekend. I really feel like I got lots done. There are some weekends when I ask myself, where did the time go? This was not one of those weekends. <br /><br />Friday night, I graded my students geometry projects. Let me say, it is taking me forever to grade all these projects. I am almost done... I hope to have them completed by the end of the week. I am sure my students are wondering when they will get them back. <br /><br />On Saturday,I was able to get groceries, clean, take a nap, play with Rafe, take Rafe to the shore, and even have a girls night out. Me, my sisters, and friends went to see "Date Night." I cannot remember the last time I laughed so hard. I highly recommend this movie.<br /><br />Today, I visited Sydney Grace's grave. It is so nice just to go and sit by her grave on such a nice day. Rafe walked around and picked little wildflowers for me and Sydney Grace, while I "visited" with Sydney. <br /><br />The weekend ended with both mine and Joel's family having a clam bake at our house. It was so good. I had never done a clam bake before, so my mom helped me. It is actually pretty easy. The best part was having the whole family at our house. During the month of January, we spent so much time together. While Sydney Grace was with us, there was not a day that went by that we did not eat together. The last time we all ate together was when Mr. Fodrie passed away. It was really nice to have everyone together for no particular reason. Rafe absolutely loves having everyone at our house. If it was up to him, we would eat together every night. He loves all his family so much. <br /><br />It was really nice to have such a nice weekend.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-29659604229218892742010-04-13T21:54:00.008-04:002010-04-13T22:49:23.947-04:00I'm ok<em>First off, this is my second time typing this entry. Somehow what I typed earlier, which was finished, got erased. I somehow think this new entry will be shorter the second time around</em>.<br /><br />I want to thank everyone for all your concerns since my last post. I want everyone to know that I am really ok. Of course, I have my moments that I am down. It has not even been three months since Sydney Grace passed. For the most part, I think I am doing better than I ever thought I would. It does seem that when I am feeling down, it is the time that I have something that I want to blog about. This blog has really been a blessing. I have lots of family and friends that I talk to, but writing about it really does help.<br /><br />For those parents that are facing the same decisions that Joel and I had to make, please know that although some of my entries seem to be really depressing, it was all worth it. The past eight months have been really hard, but I would not change my decision for anything. Our decision to keep Sydney Grace, even though we had no idea how long we would have her, before birth or after, was the best decision we ever made. She brought so much joy to not only our family, but to thousands of people who never got to meet her. Joel once asked me, before Sydney Grace was born, if I could go back and never be pregnant, would I choose to do so? My reply was that I would not change it. Although I knew Sydney Grace would not be with us long, I knew she was a gift from God. We were very fortunate to have her for twenty days, way more than we ever thought. She truly was a blessing.<br /><br /><em>I made a background link about Sydney Grace on the sidebar. For those who have not read Sydney's story before birth and after, you can read it on this link. <br /><a href="http://sydneygracesstory.blogspot.com">Sydney Grace's Story</a><br /><br />I have a few ribbon magnets left for $10. Money will be donated to the hospital nursery in Sydney Grace's name. Thanks to all that have purchased one.</em>Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-28256310337344913602010-04-10T22:55:00.002-04:002010-04-10T23:04:34.165-04:00Dreams...When Sydney Grace first passed away, and Rafe would get sad, I would tell him she was still with us. If he wanted to see her, he could dream about her. Many times when it was time for him to fall asleep we would pray for Sydney Grace and he would pray to dream about her. I asked him the other day if he has ever dreamed about her. His reply, “No.”<br /><br />Every night, when I go to bed I pray to dream about Sydney Grace. I want to hold her, I want to see her little face and hear her in my dreams. I want to feel her close to me again. My reply to if I have dreamed about her, “No.” Why? Why can’t I have this one thing? <br /><br />The other day, my mom said that she had dreamed about Sydney. She was a little girl, not a baby, with long blond hair. She could not remember her face, but knew that it was her. She said in the dream Sydney Grace went everywhere with us. Just as normal as if Rafe was with us. It meant to her that Sydney Grace is with us. She will always be with us. <br /><br />So why can’t I have a beautiful dream about my baby. I did dream about Sydney Grace about one week after she passed. In the dream, I was running down my parent’s path with Sydney in my arms. She was turning blue and dying. I knew that she was not going to make it, so I needed to get her in the house. This has been my one and only dream. Reliving the worse thing I have ever experienced, Sydney’s apnea episodes. During these episodes Sydney would turn so blue and stop breathing. When the episodes first started, we thought Sydney was dying. I am so happy this is not how she actually passed. <br /><br />I heard the song “To where you are,” by Josh Grobin the other day. It was speaking to me. Every night this is my hope, to have Sydney come back to me, if only for awhile. Maybe one night I will have this dream. I bet it will be the best dream I have ever had. I hope…..<br /><br /><em>To Where You Are <br /><br />Who can say for certain<br />Maybe you’re still here<br />I feel you all around me<br />Your memories so clear<br /><br />Deep in the stillness<br />I can hear you speak<br />You’re still an inspiration<br />Can it be (? )<br />That you are mine<br />Forever love<br />And you are watching over me from up above<br /><br /><strong>Fly me up to where you are<br />Beyond the distant star<br />I wish upon tonight<br />To see you smile<br />If only for awhile to know you’re there<br />A breath away is not far<br />To where you are<br /><br />Are you gently sleeping<br />Here inside my dream</strong><br />And isn’t faith believing<br />All power can’t be seen<br />As my heart holds you<br />Just one beat away<br />I cherish all you gave me everyday<br />‘cause you are mine<br />Forever love<br />Watching me from up above<br /><br />And I believe<br />That angels breathe<br />And that love will live on and never leave<br /><br />Fly me up<br />To where you are<br />Beyond the distant star<br />I wish upon tonight<br />To see you smile<br />If only for awhile<br />To know you’re there<br />A breath away is not far<br />To where you are<br /><br />I know you’re there<br />A breath away is not far<br />To where you are </em>Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-49593061383997971442010-04-06T22:35:00.007-04:002010-04-06T23:33:45.523-04:00Sydney's RoomWhere to begin? I have a lot of things on my mind. Some will have to wait for later posts. I know I have not been writing regularly the past month. Mostly it is due to the fact that I am back at work and I just don't have to time to write like I did before. Also, for the most part, our lives are back to some sense of normalcy. I know our lives will never be the same as before Sydney Grace, but things are back into a routine.<br /><br />I am on Easter break this week. Rafe and I are actually leaving tomorrow to go to Myrtle Beach for a few days. Rafe is really looking forward to it. I hope to go to the outlets to get Rafe some new summer clothes. <br /><br />I have spent the last couple of days cleaning. We finally got everything cleaned up from Rafe's birthday party. It was a really good party. I think everything went really well. <br /><br />Yesterday, Paige and I painted Rafe's and Sydney Grace's rooms. When we found out about Sydney Grace having trisomy 18, we did not get her room ready for her. We did not decorate or have any furniture. For a long time we did not know what we would do with this extra room. We finally decided right before Sydney was born that it would be a den. But once we were able to bring her home it became Sydney's room again. We did get her a few basics like a bassinet to go in it. <br /><br />Now that Sydney Grace is gone, it is still "her room." It will always be her room. Even if we have another child it will always be Sydney's room first. This is the room that Sydney Grace took her baths. It is were her diapers were changed and she was dressed. It is were I would rock her and a few times hold her all night. It is were Sydney Grace took her last breath in my arms. <br /><br />I chose to paint her room a rose color, or as Joel would say "pink". Here is a picture of some of Sydney Grace's things with the new wall color. <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipAp11SULjBUtJphB64gVEjn7zrC2Jgkaot7ikEDhwm_rGa6-XZHA6D22JQGC-6BzGzaONsCFtnqhxdn2UbdoOUmd2CMXWVfWAH-LozI1I_5dB25_eU8vE79OSUHVOi4Rc4aFlfFvRNjGz/s1600/newwallcolorsydney.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipAp11SULjBUtJphB64gVEjn7zrC2Jgkaot7ikEDhwm_rGa6-XZHA6D22JQGC-6BzGzaONsCFtnqhxdn2UbdoOUmd2CMXWVfWAH-LozI1I_5dB25_eU8vE79OSUHVOi4Rc4aFlfFvRNjGz/s320/newwallcolorsydney.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5457229108581620834" /></a><br /><br /><br />With all the events of the past few days (Rafe's birthday, Easter, painting), you would think I would be so busy that I would not feel so down. I have had a pretty hard day. Not crying so much, but really feeling down. I had that sick stomach feeling all day. I have not had this feeling for a long time. <br /><br />On Sunday, I got really upset. I was in church listening to a song the pastor was playing during his sermon, when I just started crying really hard. Joel looked at me and wanted to know what was wrong. What was wrong was that I was not holding Sydney Grace on that beautiful Easter Sunday! I was looking around at all the little kids. Looking at the pretty dresses, looking at the little babies. The whole time I was thinking Sydney should be in my arms with her Easter dress like all the other babies were in their mother's arms. Instead I had to leave church and go visit my baby at her grave. I was really angry. It felt really unfair. I know that my baby is definitely in a better place. She is not suffering, but I am suffering. I miss all the things that I will never get to do with her. Things that mothers and daughters do together. When will this anger and feeling sorry for myself end?Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-26520289465220740922010-04-04T15:21:00.004-04:002010-04-04T17:00:10.759-04:00Raffle WinnerThank you everyone for buying raffle tickets. We raised over <STRONG>$10,000!!!!</STRONG> Watch the video to see Rafe draw the winner. <br /><br /><object width="500" height="405"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/fKzBwoXsvkg&hl=en_US&fs=1&color1=0xcc2550&color2=0xe87a9f&border=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/fKzBwoXsvkg&hl=en_US&fs=1&color1=0xcc2550&color2=0xe87a9f&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="500" height="405"></embed></object><br /><br />Mr. Brulet is being very generous. He is donating the computer to the CGH Foundation in Sydney Grace's name.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-51510563471308676982010-04-03T20:46:00.004-04:002010-04-03T21:29:57.494-04:00Happy Birthday, Rafe!Rafe's birthday is tomorrow. He will turn four years old. Today we had a wonderful birthday party for him. He was able to invite all his friends. We had a bouncy house, cotton candy machine, icee machine, easter egg hunt and more. It was a beautiful day. The weather was spectacular. <br /><br />Joel and I have been blessed to have two wonderful children. As I tell Rafe, we have two angels. One in heaven and one on earth. Rafe has been such a blessing to our family. He, like the rest of our family, has had a pretty rough 8 months. We wanted to give Rafe a party that he would remember forever. I know he had a great day. He was so tired that he fell asleep by 8 tonight. Here is a picture of him sleeping after a long day.<A href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNypFl6VQ7mW4L_IBXK3fqmXIyUPJJ6IUPzAkGay_TL7kzE_OV7CLqcxLsCkhNPmZxVmavn3oLZn5fY9iByLQVB1uGsa9XWBJyCgz4LoZ3VPp7L9IcYK73CtA8covzO7XcJ1t5Osu6nONi/s1600/sleeping+4.3.10.jpg"><IMG style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 240px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 320px; CURSOR: hand" id=BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5456080359016438066 border=0 alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNypFl6VQ7mW4L_IBXK3fqmXIyUPJJ6IUPzAkGay_TL7kzE_OV7CLqcxLsCkhNPmZxVmavn3oLZn5fY9iByLQVB1uGsa9XWBJyCgz4LoZ3VPp7L9IcYK73CtA8covzO7XcJ1t5Osu6nONi/s320/sleeping+4.3.10.jpg"></A> <br /><br />I decided to make a video in honor of Rafe's first four years. It is set to the song "My Wish." I pray that Rafe will have a wonderful life. He has already experienced such heart ache at a very early age. I will never forget the day that he told be that he felt bad. After questioning where he hurt, he replied, "my heart, because I miss Sydney Grace." <br /><br />I hope you enjoy this slideshow as much as Rafe does. He loves watching himself as he gets older. I plan on adding photos and videos of Rafe's birthday soon. I just need the usb cable from Joel's work.<br /><br /><object width="500" height="405"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/EFySzHJRlSM&hl=en_US&fs=1&color1=0xcc2550&color2=0xe87a9f&border=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/EFySzHJRlSM&hl=en_US&fs=1&color1=0xcc2550&color2=0xe87a9f&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="500" height="405"></embed></object>Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-43759203393202562082010-03-27T22:57:00.002-04:002010-03-27T23:00:34.879-04:00Last week of computer raffleToday, it has been two months since Sydney Grace passed. It seems just like yesterday since I had her in my arms. At the same time it seems like a long time. A lot has happened in the past two months. Mr. Fodrie passed away. I have been back to work for four weeks. Joel has been really busy with work. We had a party in honor of all the people who helped our family and Sydney Grace. We have been busy.<br /><br />I am currently planning Rafe's birthday party for next weekend. His birthday falls on Easter Sunday this year. We are having a party for him on Saturday. He is so excited. He will be drawing a winning ticket for the computer raffle next weekend. So many have bought tickets. There is still time to buy. Here is the information:<br /><br />HERE IS WHAT YOU WILL WIN:<br />Dell Vostro 1520 Laptop Computer <strong>LOADED</strong><br /> Pentium T6670<br /> 2.2 GHz<br /> 4GB DDR2<br /> 800 MHz<br /> 320 GB Hard Drive<br /> Windows 7 Professional<br /> Cherry Red<br /> Bluetooth Mod<br /> 8x DVD RW<br /> Wireless card<br /> 9 cell battery<br /> 15.4" Anti glare screen<br /> <br />Chances are $20 each <br />OR 3 for $50 <br />OR 7 for $100<br /><br /> <br />If you want to have a chance to win the laptop, mail your check (made payable to Carteret General Hospital Foundation-Nursery, memo: Sydney Grace) to: <br /> <br />Glenn Lowe<br />P. O. Box 391<br />Harkers Island, NC 28531<br /> <br />Rafe will draw the winner on his birthday (April 4th) and I will notify the winner personally and make arrangements for delivery.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-50523564612411588022010-03-21T00:56:00.010-04:002010-03-21T19:00:01.922-04:00Sydney Grace's story part 3<em>As promised here is the final part of Sydney's story before and after birth.</em> <br /><br />When I reached week 28, I was still pregnant. I just knew I would deliver very soon. I had that range of week 28-32 in my head. I was ready as far as having everything planned but not ready emotionally (I don’t think I was ever ready for that.) When we first found out, I went into action. I wanted everything planned out. I wanted Sydney Grace to have a christening gown, some jewelry, and other things I would have of hers once she was gone. We talked to the doctors and expressed our wishes of doing a perinatal hospice for Sydney Grace. We talked to the funeral home and had her service planned. I knew once Sydney Grace was born, I would not be able to make many decisions. <br /><br />Week 28 went by, then 29, 30, 31, and 32. Still no labor. At this point I starting to have what I believe to be panic attacks. I had one at school one day. My heart started beating fast. I felt light headed. My arms and legs felt like jelly. I did not know what was wrong. I called my doctor’s office and was told to go directly to the hospital. Nothing was wrong with Sydney or me. While at the hospital, I had a small breakdown. I just could not handle this anymore. I was so ready for this pain to be over. I was at the point in my pregnancy that I thought Sydney would have been born. I never imagined she would make it this long. <br /><br />Since I had made it this far, I was given the option to be induced at 37 weeks. The problem, 37 weeks was December 23. I definitely did not want to be induced two days before Christmas. After having my small breakdown in November, I wanted to go ahead and be induced as soon as possible. At 34 weeks, if the doctors would have allowed it, I would have done it then, or so I thought. They would not for a number of reasons. The soonest would be 36 weeks. I actually went to the hospital on Dec. 14 with false labor. I was so upset during this, that the doctor offered to induce me that night, a few days before 36 weeks. <br /><br />Now it was decision time. Just days before, I had decided to let go and let God be in control. My biggest fear was that Sydney Grace would be born and die during Christmas. I did not want that for Rafe. I wanted his Christmas to be the best. When the doctor offered to induce me I was back to wanting it to be over. I just knew that if I was induced the outcome would not be any different than if Sydney came on her own time. I was so wrong. I struggled that night. I wanted someone to tell me what to do. No one would. They said it was my decision. Then Joel said something that made me realize I could never decide to induce just for the sake of wanting it to be over. He said, “He wanted Sydney Grace with us as long as possible, if that meant two hours, two days, or two weeks.” He was not ready to give her up. I was not either. I wanted the pain to be over, not realizing if I decided to induce, the pain would probably be worse down the road. I would always have the “what ifs.” I went home that night content with my decision. I was blessed to have Sydney as long as possible. <br /><br />I went back to the hospital again on December 30 thinking I could be in labor again. I was not. I had so many Braxton hicks contractions during this pregnancy. Once again, it was offered for me to be induced. Once again, I said no.<br /><br />When I went to the doctor on January 5, the doctor strongly suggested that I get induced. This time it was because my blood pressure was too high. I was at 39 weeks and because of my blood pressure they did not want to take any risk to my health. I was admitted on the night of January 6. They started softening my cervix and were to give me drugs to induce labor the next morning. That did not have to happen.<br /><br />In the middle of the night, I woke up with contractions, but they were not registering on the monitor, so they kept me on the medicine to soften by cervix. They continued for a few hours. Then my water broke and I was 3 cm. Forty-five minutes later I was 4 cm and ten minutes later Sydney Grace was born at 5:11am. Sydney Grace came so fast that the doctor did not even make it in on time. Two nurses finished delivering her. She was Frank Breach, which means her butt came out first, then her feet. I was trying not to push as the nurses were trying to get everything ready, but I could not help it. She basically just fell out. The nurses did help get her head out last. The first thing I asked was if she was alive. One nurse said, “I am sorry, but no.” I just started crying. I knew this was a very likely possibility, but I so badly want to see her alive if for only minutes. It seemed like an eternity, but probably only 15 seconds later, the nurse said she believed she heard a faint heartbeat. It was very week and irregular, but continued to get stronger and stronger as the hours went on.<br /><br />On that first day, I remember counting the hours that she was alive. We never imagined she would live more than a few minutes with her heart condition. She kept getting stronger and stronger. She continued until day five. I really believe up until this point in my life, I had never experienced a day any worse than that day. We took her to Greenville to a pediatric cardiologist to determine if her fetal diagnosis was correct. Images of her heart would be greatly improved from those of when she was inside me. The doctor was very wonderful, but he confirmed that Sydney Grace’s original diagnosis was correct. One thing we found out was that along with her fatal heart defect, she had another defect that was keeping her alive. A ductus that closes after babies are born had not yet closed. This usually closes after a few hours or at most, a few days after birth. Sydney’s was extra large. This was what was keeping her heart from having to take over getting blood to the lungs. The ductus (PDA) was basically doing the heart’s job. We really did not have any idea as to when Sydney would pass. It could be on the car ride home or six months from now. After meeting with the doctor, we met with a genetic counselor. It was then that Sydney had her first apnea episode. I looked down and she was completely blue and stopped breathing. The doctor rushed back in and said her heart rate was down drastically. He could no longer hear the murmur (which indicated the ductus was closing or closed). He took another look at her heart with an ultrasound and it was back open. I had never been so scared in my life. The rest of the day I was so down. I was in this deep depression and had no idea how to get out of it. I believe Joel was really scared for me. I did not know how we could move forward. Knowing that she could die at any second or be with us for months. <br /><br />The next day Sydney Grace had another episode, this time about 20 minutes. We thought it was the end. We called everyone to the hospital thinking she could not last much longer. That night the episodes continued to get worse and worse. Once again we called everyone in the middle of the night, thinking she would not make it to the morning. Once again she fooled us. Without being too graphic, let me just say, no one should ever have to witness their child go through these episodes, with some lasting more than 30 minutes. This was the first time, Joel and I, really started questioning God. We had accepted that we would not have Sydney Grace long. We were just so thankful to have her for any amount of time. We were now starting to understand why Sydney Grace had been placed on this earth. We were amazed at the number of people being brought to their knees in prayer because of Sydney. For the life of us though, we could not understand why Sydney had to suffer so much. Watching her struggle for a breath was heartbreaking. Why did she have to go through so much? I am not sure I will ever know.<br /><br />Once again, it was time to pray for strength to be there for Sydney Grace during these times. As Joel said, “this was our new normal.” Having to deal with these episodes was sadly something we got used to. Obviously, it was not fun, but we were not so scared every time thinking she was about to die. Sydney Grace lived for 15 more days after her very first episode. We were able to bring her home. We were able to share her with probably close to 200 people. She was truly a blessing to so many people.<br /><br />When Sydney Grace passed away, I am so thankful that she did not struggle. As I held her, and we looked at each other, her breathing just starting slowing down until she took her last breath at 2:07 am on January 27, 2010. It was just Sydney Grace, Joel and I in the room. It was so peaceful. I know this is going to sound weird, but it was a beautiful experience. I was privileged to be this child’s mother. God chose me. What an honor! She was inside me for 9 months. She came into this world with just Joel and me and two nurses. She left this world with just Joel and me with her. <br /><br />Sydney Grace has taught me so much. One, I am much stronger than I, or anyone else, thought I would ever be. Because of her, I have seen Joel in a whole new light. He is such a good man. I am lucky to have him. She taught all of us what a miracle really is. It is the love of God. <br /><br />Thank you, Sydney Grace, for being my daughter.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-65339428281342383742010-03-15T23:34:00.005-04:002010-03-16T20:16:49.335-04:00Ordinary MiracleI heard the song "Ordinary Miracle" the other day. I instantly thought about Sydney Grace and the miracle that she was. On her first day, we counted the minutes then the hours that she was still with us. We knew that when she survived that first day that she was a miracle. <br /><br />I decided to make a slideshow of just Sydney Grace's first day set to this song. I hope you enjoy. (Please remember to turn off the music at the bottom of the blog before you watch the video.)<br /><br />Photography by Aly Dart.<br /><br /><object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/08kwYRwCkz4&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/08kwYRwCkz4&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-40231200885164563372010-03-14T20:59:00.004-04:002010-03-14T23:32:37.981-04:00Trisomy Awareness MonthMarch is Trisomy Awareness Month. Please visit www.trisomy.org to see how Trisomy abnormalities have affected so many families. Everyone knows about Trisomy 21, Down Syndrome, and now Trisomy 18, Edwards Syndrome, but there are many other Trisomy abnormalities. There are more families dealing with trisomies than I ever knew about. I never thought anything like this would happen to our family. I was wrong. Please pray for all the families who are living with this new reality, just as we are. <br /><br />As I was looking at articles about Trisomy 18, I came across this <a href="http://video.nytimes.com/video/2007/02/08/health/1194817113313/perinatal-hospice-care.html"><strong><em>video</em></strong></a>. I have tried to write about our experience and the choices we have made. This video shows two families that had to make the same decisions as us. When I looked at this video, it was like these families were taking the words out of my mouth. Please watch this to see how when faced with the terrible news, the same that we received 7 months ago, these families faced it with love and grace. As I have said before, when people say how strong they think I am, I say "I am no stronger than the rest." When you are faced with a situation like ours, you find the strength to get through it. I found my strength in God and my family. My nightly prayer has always been, "Thy will be done." I have always prayed for the strength to get through anything that life brings me. I truly believe that through the grace of God, I am getting through it. Some days are easier than others, but I know I will be ok.<br /><br />I want to share a poem someone sent me a while back. It speaks to everything I am trying to say.<br /><br />God’s Lent Child<br />I'll lend you for a little while <br />A child of mine, God said <br />For you to love the while she lives <br />And mourn for when she's dead. <br />It may be six or seven years <br />or forty-two or three; <br />But will you, till I call her back <br />Take care of her for me? <br />She'll bring her charm to gladden you <br />And -should her stay be brief- <br />You'll have her lovely memories <br />As a solace for your grief. <br />I cannot promise she will stay <br />Since all from Earth return; <br />But there are lessons taught below <br />I want this child to learn. <br />I've looked the whole world over <br />In my search for teachers true; <br />And from the things that crowd life's lane <br />I have chosen you. <br />Now will you give her all your love? <br />Nor think the labor in vain? <br />Nor hate me when I come to take <br />This lent child home again? <br />I fancied that I heard them say <br />"Dear Lord, Thy will be done" <br />For all the joys Thy child will bring <br />The risk of grief we'll run. <br />We will shelter her with tenderness <br />We'll love her while we may, <br />And for the happiness we've known <br />Forever grateful stay. <br />But should the angels call for her <br />Much sooner than we've planned, <br />We'll brave the bitter grief that comes <br />And try to understand. <br />~Author UnknownLindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-72667264268445029912010-03-12T21:37:00.003-05:002010-03-12T22:00:55.125-05:00Better WeekI have had a better week. Last week was my first week back at work. The teachers and students were wonderful, but I was having a hard time moving on and starting a new chapter after Sydney Grace. This week I think I have come to terms with my new reality. I still have moments that it hits me like a ton of bricks that Sydney Grace is gone. Just this afternoon I was pumping gas, and I almost starting crying. Who knows why? Nothing had happened. No one had said anything, but Sydney Grace popped in my mind and I so desperately wanted her.<br /><br />Part of my good week was being able to take Rafe to see the high school musical of Willy Wonka. Rafe absolutely LOVES this movie. He was so excited seeing all the characters. There were little kids who played squirrels. He is now saying he wants to be in the play next year. Those of you who knows Rafe, knows that he loves to act. He will act out entire scenes from movies, word for word. He has always been like this. Of course, I am his mother and biased, but I really think he is very talented. I know, I know! All mothers probably think the same thing about their kids.<br /><br />We are actually in Wilmington tonight. Joel has a conference down here, so Rafe and I drove down after school today. Rafe is so excited because he got to go swimming with his daddy in the pool. That is definitely their favorite thing to do when we stay at a hotel. Tomorrow we are going to probably see the USS North Carolina. I hope Rafe likes it. <br /><br />Finally, thanks to everyone who has bought raffle tickets for the computer. We are raising lots of money for the hospital.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-45291001777922490592010-03-08T22:33:00.003-05:002010-03-08T22:50:08.611-05:00RaffleAs everyone knows by now, we are trying to raise money for the nursery and labor/delivery departments at Carteret General. There has been some things mentioned as to what to do with the money. One being possibly having a pediatric division of the Carteret County Hospice. Luckily, pediatric hospice is something that is not needed often here, but when it is, it is not available. We were trying to get services for Sydney, but never did before she passed due to insurance not wanting to pay for out of network services. Our family was lucky, we had a great support system where Sydney always had at least two adults with her at all times. There may be some families in the county that might not be so lucky. <br /><br />Because of this we are trying to raise more money. My parents have purchased and donated a laptop computer to be raffled. <br /><br />HERE IS WHAT YOU WILL WIN:<br />Dell Vostro 1520 Laptop Computer <strong>LOADED</strong><br /> Pentium T6670<br /> 2.2 GHz<br /> 4GB DDR2<br /> 800 MHz<br /> 320 GB Hard Drive<br /> Windows 7 Professional<br /> Cherry Red<br /> Bluetooth Mod<br /> 8x DVD RW<br /> Wireless card<br /> 9 cell battery<br /> 15.4" Anti glare screen<br /> <br />Chances are $20 each <br />OR 3 for $50 <br />OR 7 for $100<br /><br /> <br />If you want to have a chance to win the laptop, mail your check (made payable to Carteret General Hospital Foundation-Nursery, memo: Sydney Grace) to: <br /> <br />Glenn Lowe<br />P. O. Box 391<br />Harkers Island, NC 28531<br /> <br />Rafe will draw the winner on his birthday (April 4th) and I will notify the winner personally and make arrangements for delivery.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-50102918129087394272010-03-07T23:02:00.009-05:002010-03-08T22:33:37.146-05:00Two MonthsSydney Grace would have been two months old today. I wonder how big she would have been. She was so little when she was born (4 lbs 3.8 oz) and had gotten down to 3 lbs 12 oz. I wonder if she would have hit the 5 lb mark. I wonder if she would have been drinking from a bottle and not having to use the feeding tube. There are a lot of "I wonders..."<br /><br />We had a pretty good weekend. It started off Friday with me visiting my cousin in the hospital after she had a beautiful baby boy. His name is Kenan Gage and was born 9 lbs 4oz. He has blond hair and I think looks like his uncle, Kenneth. Savannah, his older sister absolutely adores him. I did not know how I would feel visiting. I was really nervous I would breakdown walking up to the labor and delivery. I have to admit when I found out he was born, I did cry. I was wanting to have Sydney Grace back so badly. Gage being born brought back all the memories of Sydney's birth and our stay at the hospital. As I got off the elevator one of my favorite nurses was at the nurses station. When she saw me she got up and gave me a big hug. She made me feel so good. As I walked in the room I saw Gage, and I instantly wanted to hold him. There was no sadness for Sydney. I was holding another miracle of God.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTlou8l2TsnMQb5CtL5SpjDk7Z418RdoCAlxlwCJiDd5pBb9wwtWXTQ6Xph2_KD6DhgRERQ5L-7IiZqgfDGIK6wlopakTdk3wUyYVff9PfZotxyLV_5c09iwYiWrnWtK86r5Ti5XqCpjZV/s1600-h/Savannah&Gage.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTlou8l2TsnMQb5CtL5SpjDk7Z418RdoCAlxlwCJiDd5pBb9wwtWXTQ6Xph2_KD6DhgRERQ5L-7IiZqgfDGIK6wlopakTdk3wUyYVff9PfZotxyLV_5c09iwYiWrnWtK86r5Ti5XqCpjZV/s320/Savannah&Gage.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5446120977010519698" /></a><br /><br /><br />Last night we had a party in honor of all the wonderful people that helped us with Sydney Grace. We honored the nurses and friends that made Sydney Grace's 20 days the best. I have talked before about how much I love the nurses at Carteret General. Last night three of those nurses were able to attend our party. I was so happy to see them again. We also had Hilary, Karen, Alan and Yvette, AnMarie, and all the Hancocks. These friends were so wonderful to our family during those twenty days and beyond. I have always heard the saying "you find out your true friends when times get tough.." Well we had so many friends support us through Sydney Grace's life. I don't know how we can ever thank them enough.<br /><br />Today, within an hour of waking up our doorbell rang. Joel answered to find a flower delivery. We thought, "Who would be sending me flowers on a Sunday." It was my team at school, The Starfish. They knew today would have been Sydney Grace's two month birthday and sent me flowers. My team is the best. I was so blessed to be placed on the Starfish team when I was hired at the beginning of the year. My cup runneth over....<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyrTT71ChLHIkKK92P5mi5uJZ0LZ_DIwEgv7nlYb_nFxgbe9fG7z1bDXOt8rvOxN6OeJJVBYKMlhmgk8wSmya_8frXROXlzuk5RLcOGgxGdiGYC0UGW-lUooU_08iuqeiUcx2D84NHMcLU/s1600-h/flowers.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyrTT71ChLHIkKK92P5mi5uJZ0LZ_DIwEgv7nlYb_nFxgbe9fG7z1bDXOt8rvOxN6OeJJVBYKMlhmgk8wSmya_8frXROXlzuk5RLcOGgxGdiGYC0UGW-lUooU_08iuqeiUcx2D84NHMcLU/s320/flowers.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5446112455591953314" /></a><br /><br /><br />This afternoon I went to visit Sydney Grace's grave. When I got there I was surprised to see that her footstone had been placed. I was also surprised that I was actually not upset to see it there. I know some people might see their child's grave marker and be very upset. Upset to see their child's name on a grave. Of course I would give anything to have Sydney Grace back, but I saw her marker as another way to show this world that she lived. That she will never been forgotten. As others walk through the cemetery, they will see her name and know that there was a little girl that graced our presence for twenty wonderful days. They might never know what a miracle she was, but they will know that she was "our borrowed angel."<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjK3RhIGRJ0NzfqqLuiVPgXaXOZ7MkhgCr0Z_HBQdWhFrtHytxUMKINs-B_5xc-OlGHcArUg_sAB8SFErRVRUoDeuf4VGWLfnAzgBh1fnrISYo-X-O9A2dIZ-rvyYHaNZS8fQTYgbYoSMHB/s1600-h/footstone.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjK3RhIGRJ0NzfqqLuiVPgXaXOZ7MkhgCr0Z_HBQdWhFrtHytxUMKINs-B_5xc-OlGHcArUg_sAB8SFErRVRUoDeuf4VGWLfnAzgBh1fnrISYo-X-O9A2dIZ-rvyYHaNZS8fQTYgbYoSMHB/s320/footstone.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5446114735259782786" /></a>Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-40478958549299131222010-03-05T21:55:00.006-05:002010-03-05T22:11:31.595-05:00Aly's PhotosThis week has been interesting. Getting back to work has been great. I LOVE my school. My coworkers are great. They are so supportive. The students are wonderful. They have been so good. They are amazing kids. With school being so good, it is weird to say that this has been one of my hardest weeks since losing Sydney Grace. I have cried more this week than in the past couple of weeks. I am really missing her.<br /><br />Yesterday I got a treat. Aly came over to my house to share all the photos she took of Sydney. ALMOST 3000! I loved looking at them. Now I have to decide what pictures to buy. There are so many, I don't know how I will ever be able to make a decision. <br /><br />Speaking of Aly, I finally got the slide show she made for Sydney Grace's wake on youtube. They are also on the sidebar under "Videos." Remember to turn off the music on my playlist at the bottom of the blog before you watch the videos on the side bar.<br /><br />Here are the links to the slide show. They are in two parts.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8_-SYqYqO4&feature=channel">Tribute to Sydney Grace part 1 of 2</a><br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H1AuLVvBJnQ&feature=channel">Tribute to Sydney Grace part 2 of 2</a>Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-31519223219076914212010-03-01T20:41:00.004-05:002010-03-02T11:02:35.996-05:00First Day BackI went to work today for the first time in 10 weeks. I cried all the way to work today. Not because I was not wanting to work, but because the last time I worked Sydney Grace was still with me. I also think by going to work today I was starting a new phase of my life without Sydney. For the past few weeks I have been at home consumed with things to do with Sydney Grace. I have been working on the blog, writing thank you notes, sending out announcements, organizing her clothes and gifts, and starting her scrapbook. It has all been about Sydney Grace. It made me sad today because it occurred to me that Sydney Grace was not going to be my daily focus anymore. It was like I was losing her all over again.<br /><br />When I got to school, I was welcomed so warmly. The teachers had a welcome back breakfast in my honor. It was so nice to feel so loved and supported by so many people. I think most of my students were really excited to see me (that makes me feel so good.) I had students give me cards and presents. Two student went together and gave me another Willow Tree statue called "Surrounded by Love." Once again, Willow Tree has a statue to fit every situation. I was surrounded by love today and I really felt it. <br /><br />I decided to show my students a slide show of Sydney Grace. I wanted to share this with them so they could see what a miracle she was. I never talked about my pregnancy while I was teaching, because I did not want to upset the students and I did not want to get upset myself. I told the students today I never shared with them because I never knew when Sydney would pass away. It was too painful to talk about it with them. I showed them the slide show because I really wanted them to share in my love for Sydney Grace. I wanted them to see who they all had been praying for during those 20 days. I told them I did not want them to be sad but, happy. Happy because we did get a miracle. Something we never thought we would have.<br /><br />It is good to be back at work. I can't wait for tomorrow!Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-45950621066695023402010-02-27T22:35:00.006-05:002010-02-28T09:41:15.145-05:00The Choice I never thought I would have to consider…<em>Today it has been one month since Sydney Grace became an angel. It seems like it was just yesterday I was holding her in my arms. Days are getting easier. I plan on starting back to work on Monday. I really have missed my friends and students. </em><br /><br /><em>As promised here is the next part of Sydney Grace's story before she was born. I hope to finish her story in a few days.....</em><br /><br />We went to a specialist in Jacksonville on August 20, 2009. While we were waiting to see the doctor, I noticed a sign they had posted in the waiting room. It asked for patience while waiting reminding us that some women may be getting bad news even the death of their child. For some reason it did not occur to me that the sign was talking about us. <br /><br />When we were finally called back, we saw a technician that took measurements and told us we were having a girl. When she left, a genetic counselor came in. She was extremely nice and caring, but she started talking about Trisomy 18. I had absolutely no clue what she was talking about. I had never heard of it before. I did know that trisomy 21 was Down syndrome, so I thought it might be something very similar. Then she said the words that I was not prepared for, “Trisomy 18 is Fatal in the majority of cases.” I was completely shocked. I did not even cry. It was like she was talking about someone else. Not me and my baby. Then the doctor came in. He did another ultrasound and starting pointing out why he thought Sydney Grace had T18. He talked about the cysts on her brain and how her brain was not formed right in the front. He talked about her heart and how the only thing that would fix it was a transplant. He talked about her fingers and how her pinky and index fingers overlap the others. He talked about my placenta and how it was shaped different. He said normal placentas were shaped kind of like a sheet cake and my placenta was like a cupcake shape. Still this whole time I did not cry.<br /><br />Next the doctor told me my choices. The reason I got to see the doctor so fast was because he wanted me to have the choice to terminate if I wanted to. In North Carolina, I believe he said I had until 20 weeks and 6 days to have a late term abortion. I was 19 weeks and 1 day. Of course he did not try to persuade me, he was very caring. He just wanted me to have the option if that was what we decided. He recommended an amino to be sure. We decided to have the amino. Let me say it HURT. They told me it would feel like cramps. I was thinking menstrual cramps. I thought no big deal. Not so. After it was over, I told them it felt like someone was tying my intestines in knots. Of course I could not move and all I wanted to do was to jump off the table. This is when I started crying. Crying from physical pain and crying that I was going through this. I was looking at the ceiling during the amnio thinking, I can’t believe this is happening. I can’t believe it was happening to me. I hear about other women with difficult pregnancies or miscarriages, but I never thought I would be one of them. We found out a week later that Sydney Grace had full Trisomy 18, meaning she had it in every cell of her body. It is possible to have mosaic trisomy 18 were it is not present in every cell.<br /><br />I could not believe having an abortion was even an option for me. That was something I definitely never thought I would ever have to think about. Of course, it was not something I thought about long. How could I ever decide to kill my child? It was not my decision when Sydney Grace would die. It was God’s only. <br /><br />Now I am going to share something that I am ashamed to say. When we did the amnio the doctor told me that they bring a small risk of a miscarriage. I could not make the decision to abort my child but I was hoping I would have a miscarriage. That first day, I could not imagine how I was going to get through this pregnancy. I just wanted it to be over. The doctor went through what could happen through the rest of my pregnancy. There was a good chance I could still miscarry. If I did not miscarry, I had a good chance of going into preterm labor, probably between 28-32 weeks. If Sydney was still alive during labor she would probably die during childbirth. And if she actually made it through the delivery she would only live for minutes, not even hours. <br /><br />Knowing all this, probably for the first week I wanted to miscarry. I was really feeling sorry for myself. I was the one that had to carry this baby that was not going to survive. I had to feel her move inside me. I had to be the one that would be approached by strangers and answer questions about the sex of the baby or when I was due. I was the one that had to live with this 24/7, without a break. All I had to do was look down at my growing belly to be reminded. I never could escape from the pain of it all. I wanted it over.<br /><br />Probably about a week later it occurred to me. I was the lucky one. I was lucky because I was the one that got to feel her move inside me. I was the one that got to feel her grow inside me. I was the one that got to be with her 24/7. I was definitely the lucky one. Others in my family would only be able to experience Sydney Grace for minutes (so we thought) but I would be able to experience her for months. What a blessing!<br /><br />Throughout the rest of my pregnancy, I had my ups and downs. It was still very hard. One thing that really helped me get through it was my work. When I first found out about Sydney having T18, I was really close to calling my principal and saying I was sorry but I would not be able to work this year. I just did not see how I would do it. I was so afraid I would have a breakdown in front of my students. When the first day of school came, I made myself get up and go. I cried all the way to school, but when I got there and met my students, I knew I had made the right choice. Being at school was an escape from my pain. For those 8 hours a day I was able to focus on my kids and math.<br /><br />The last 10 weeks of my pregnancy were the hardest….Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-28843412930418117122010-02-26T20:50:00.003-05:002010-02-26T20:56:57.088-05:00A Celebration of the life of Jimmie FodrieMr. Fodrie's service will be tomorrow at 11am at Carteret Memorial Gardens.<br /><br /> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5zM3Q-8QrZDMh0DwqrjIva4aWqn8gflGs46g3jIdk5MZz46ZJYkJ-uscRzkVtprNUToiHtsfhyphenhyphenXfPa_L3rynRXU3D1ol7LGPaPJSBEU3uANEksEq7sn3NU6iQq9uZj5YIVfta1YQ6axU7/s1600-h/mr.fodrie.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 136px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5zM3Q-8QrZDMh0DwqrjIva4aWqn8gflGs46g3jIdk5MZz46ZJYkJ-uscRzkVtprNUToiHtsfhyphenhyphenXfPa_L3rynRXU3D1ol7LGPaPJSBEU3uANEksEq7sn3NU6iQq9uZj5YIVfta1YQ6axU7/s200/mr.fodrie.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5442736077202996498" /></a><br /><em><br />James Edward Fodrie Jr. was born December 12, 1931 to Grace and James Fodrie Sr. in Beaufort. He was watched over by his beloved sister, Jean. While he was not running the streets from Beaufort to Core Creek, he attended Beaufort Graded School where he made many friendships that would last a lifetime. After graduation he attended Atlantic Christian College, attaining a teaching degree in math (he also claimed to have attended Duke, Chapel Hill, and East Carolina). Jimmie’s career began with his first job working as a delivery boy for James Potter. He served in the United States Army and was a principal, teacher, coach, and restaurant manager/investor.<br /> <br />One of Jimmie’s most outstanding qualities was his generosity. Christmas at the Fodrie house put Santa Claus’ workshop to shame. He was a generous contributor to many charities and enjoyed raising funds to enable students to participate in school events. Jimmie was always willing to give his last dollar to anyone in need. He also greatly enjoyed donating to the “Domino Club” kitty each week. <br /> <br />Jimmie was well-known for his wit and sense of humor. Never one to let the truth get in the way of a good story, he loved nothing better than spinning tall tales about his childhood. Stories about his adventures growing up rivaled any told by Mark Twain. He captivated many students with his “Ooga-Ooga” story and tales of camping on Shackelford and exploits in the Beaufort gym.<br /> <br />Jimmie’s contemporaries remember him as a naturally gifted athlete who excelled in basketball, baseball, football, softball, and golf. Highlights of his athletic career included playing semi-pro basketball and baseball, competing in the barehanded softball world series, and scoring two holes in one. He was well-known for shooting half-court hook shots through the rafters of the Beaufort gym. He shared his passion for sports with countless young people as a coach. He demanded the best from his players and led them to achieve record successes. His dedication to his players extended beyond the court as he provided his time and energy to helping them receive scholarships and career opportunities. Jimmie maintained life-long friendships with many of his players and considered them to be his “boys.” <br /> <br />He is survived by his children, Jamison Fodrie Ipock, James Edward Fodrie III, and Fredrick Joel Fodrie; and three grandchildren, Jessica Grace Robinson, William Jesse Ipock IV, and Hubert Glenn Rafe Fodrie. He was preceded in death by his parents; his wife, Freda Kay Fodrie; his sister, Jean Fodrie Musselwhite; and his granddaughter, Sydney Grace Fodrie.</em>Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-359918789138246276.post-21057061882171231302010-02-24T19:11:00.004-05:002010-02-24T20:28:45.009-05:00Sydney Grace Welcomes her Granddaddy to HeavenThank you everyone for your continued prayers for our family. Joel's dad passed away today. I would like to share a comment someone made today on facebook that made me feel good.<br /><br /><em>I can see Sydney taking Jimmie's hand and showing him all over Heaven..."look over here, Grandpa!"</em><br /><br />Because of Mr. Fodrie's illness, he only got to meet Sydney Grace one time. Now Sydney Grace has her Nana Kay and her Granddaddy to hold her in heaven.Lindseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02280729488336431685noreply@blogger.com9